I'm going to be a real life mom

[ummm]

hi, i'm going to be a real life mom, and i'm scared.

a few questions:

will my pussy go slack?

is it safe to have sex? by b/f and me like to do it hard

how long after birth will i be sore for?

what about internal examinations?

yep i'm scared, my life going to change, how do i know i will cope

will my belly go back to normal?

what about strechs marks?

will my boobs drop if i breast feed?

sorry for all question s but i need to know and i embassed to ask mid wife.

ummmm think thats it (for now)

xx

[Sunflower]

Hi ummm, it's pretty hard to answer these questions. Not least because I'm not a Mother but let me say congratulations to you! I'm sure the next few months/years will be full of both exciting and nerve wrecking times but I'm sure it will be worth every second of it. I'm sure you have the answers to your questions bynow through the proper channels but I'd like to wish you all the best for mortherhood x

[SSBF]

Alot of your questions can be answered by your physician. I can only speak from my personal experience though. My pussy did not get "slack". As long as you are having a normal pregnancy sex should be ok but ask your doc. As for stretch marks...some women get them some don't. Your belly can go back as before but that will take some work. And as for your life changing...it sure will! We can only take it one day at a time and try to cope. Motherhood can be scary but in the end it is totally worth everything you go through. Totally. Good luck!

[mskitty6-9]

Congratulations, Ummm.

I have never had kids...but my god kids are true joys.

A good ob/gyn will see you throughout the pregancy.

If you smoke, please stop. If you drink or do drugs, please stop. Everything you do affects your child...so good nutrition is important, too, as is proper rest.

Your life has changed as soon as you found out you were expecting. You have a life dependent on you...I went through this with my best friend and saw first hand the changes she made in her life, like good nurtrition and rest.

But she has a beautiful little girl who will be 3 on Sunday...
and I will be there to celebrate...did she think it was worth it?

Oh hell yeah!!

[ms.shedevil]

Well I'm new here but not new to the mother thing. As for what the other ladies said you should always ask all questions to your doctor. Make a list up just like you did her with us and give it to them. If you feel uncomfortable about taking with them. this also helps because you get nervous and may forget what you wanted to ask. I can tell you from my expernices that walking is the best thing for you as long as the doctor says its okay. It helps with the muscles in the abdominal area and doing the keflex( not sure of correct spelling) excersie while walking will help strengthen the vaginal wall for when you are in labor.This is when you squeeze your vagina tight just like when you orgasm. do these in sets of five. You can do these any time of the day anywhere. No one will ever know. you can even practice when you are having sex. He'll think this is cool. Trust me it drives them wild. This helps with contractions and less tearing. Almost all women tear a little but as long as you do these thing it will help in pregnancy and afterwards. Being a mom is scary and exciting at the same time.
Just remember that no mom is ever alone. Reach out for help and From what I see in here so far you can always have a friendly ear to lean on. Good luck and keep us informed.:thumbsup:

[lauraincanada]

Hey there! Just saw this and sorry I didn't reply sooner. I'm currently 7 mos pregnant with my second child (my first baby is 6! lol).


will my pussy go slack?


Not in my experience!! I will say if you have any tearing at all, you may experience the reverse for a while after the birth. I had a 3rd degree tear (look it up at your own peril!!) which was repaired. After all of the stitches were out and I was technically "healed" and we attempted to have sex (6 wks postpartum), I felt a lot tighter than before. To the point of pain! And we were using a lot of lube. The explanation I got from my OB was that it is in essence, scar tissue, which by nature is tighter than regular tissue. I was prescribed a topical testosterone cream for the area and that did help, but time was the only thing that really returned things to normal. And now? I'm definitely not tight tight (who is, aside from the 18 yr olds out there!) but not looser either.


is it safe to have sex? by b/f and me like to do it hard


Talk to your midwife/OB/Dr. If you are in a low risk pregnancy, it should be fine. There are certain conditions that can make it inadvisable, such as spotting, low lying placenta, any unexplained bleeding etc. I've never had any serious issues, personally, and we are also rather vigorous!! The one thing I did experience was a slight pink tinged discharge after particularly hard sex, which was mainly related (I'm told) to having a "friable cervix" during pregnancy (ie. one that is sensitive and more prone to bleeding).


how long after birth will i be sore for?


Well they say the magic number is 6 weeks postpartum. You have the appt. where you have an exam and generally get the "all clear" that your significant other has been waiting for!! That doesn't mean that you will be ready and won't be sore at that point. But the flow of lochia should have stopped by that point, which is a big thing.

For attempt number one, slow and steady is the rule, lots of foreplay, lots and lots of lube. It may hurt at first, if so, slower, slower and if necessary, stop and try again another time.


what about internal examinations?


Not as bad as you think. By the time they start doing those, you're generally far enough along that you really don't care who sees your hoochie anymore. :rotfl:


yep i'm scared, my life going to change, how do i know i will cope


We all think that. But we do cope. And eventually, things are even better than before. Intimacy, love, respect and a sex life do eventually return.


will my belly go back to normal?


It may be a little different, it may be the same, it may be drastically changed. That aspect of things, from what I understand, is partly genetic and partly related to post partum excercise.

Breastfeeding helps immensely in getting your tummy back to normal and returning to your pre-pregnancy shape and body weight. As well, it is the best way to feed your child and bond with your baby. Lactating produces hormones that help to shrink your uterus back to it's normal size, and the extra calories that are burned by feeding another little person are a big help. It is amazing!! I was wearing my old pre-preg jeans a few weeks after giving birth.


what about strechs marks?


Genetic. Nothing you can do to prevent them. The creams are marketing gimmicks. You will get them or you won't, but your partner will still love you as the mother of his child, stretch marks and all.


will my boobs drop if i breast feed?


They will get a LOT bigger!!! And then smaller again when you wean. Drop? I don't think so, in my experience. But that again may be mostly genetic, like stretch marks. Your nipples and breasts will look different. But really, the health and convenience benefits to nursing far outweigh any potential changes to the appearance of your breasts.

Whew! That was a novel!!!

Good luck, and feel free to pm me with any questions! I'm sure you'll do fine!! And congrats!!