problem for me and gf

[pepsi_375]

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[EvilHandyAndy]

Damn sounds like you have a few problems there
Not to worry though
seems you suffer from whats called "ED" or erctyle dysfuntion
and no im not fucking with you
its a common thing ,more than you know
but to start we need some more info about you
how is your health other wise ?
when was the last time you had you blood tested
most of the symtoms you have described sound like men whoam are diabetic,do you pee alot?
see a hard on results from the excitement of you organ and then the blood flow is directed to you man hood and fills to size trigering the nerves which work the seamen glands
and it very common for men with low blood sugar to get or mantain a hardon or reach orgasim
now there are tons of medicaditions you can take for this but i strongly sujest seeing a doctor first
now if it was just once in a while it could be due to stress,you diet,smoking to much ,theres a number of thing that could factor into it
but if its a regular problem you need to get yur ass to a doctor
and be honest! if you lie to your doctor (even though i know its a hard subject to deal with) but if you lie to him ,then he cant help you because your feeding him the wrong information and there not mindreaders
and then be honest with your partner
say hey honey i'm haveing this problem and im gonna go see this guy about it
you wanna come along?
and if you do this she will realize that its neither of your faults and it will bring you both closer together
besides think of all the fun you can have trying new things


and how do i know all of this ?
i have a medical backround and im a diabetic
and theres a whole world of help for you and even exerizes you can do to streghthen that love mussel


I'm Eha and i hope i have helped

[pepsi_375]

Cheers for that advice..

I dont think i pee more then the average person. Like the more i drink the more i pee. Like today. I got up at 11 and i have been to the toilet once and that was just after i got up and its now 2.30.

After she leave i can get a load off no worries. Would it be that i am thinking about it too much and putting my self off?

My job. I was made redundent aabout 6 months ago and since picked up some casual work at mc donalds. Since then my diet has been poor and my sleep pattern is irregular. Most of the time i get 5 hrs sleep and im awake again. prob once a week im awake for upto 40 hrs at a time. And most of the time im too tired to eat. I know all this is bad but i try my hardest to make it all good.

I have a job intervieew today that if i get the job, i will be regular work hours again, 7.30am to 3pm monday to friday.

So you think the doctor will be able to help. I had full bloods done about a yr ago and they said i was all healthy then.

3 months ago i was at the doctor suffering from depression but that has cleared up with a lifestyle change.

I dont smoke or do drugs either.

Would viagra work?

[Shannonx]

The problemm is, its like a vicious circle.

You worry about not being able to cum, so when the time comes, you can't do it, your too pepped up thinking about it. So next time comes around, you are worrying even more.

A trip to the docs will be ideal, just get it told to them and then see what he says.

In the mean time (and I know this is easier sad than done) try to put it to the back of your mind, create a mood, get your self relaxed, massage each other, take your time, have some soft music on, all the cliché stuff and just try to be in the moment rather than thinking "shit, I hope I cum tonight" and see what happens, no preassure.

But definatly get to the doctors, and please don't be shy about it, most men go through some sort of problem in that area in their life, and it wont be anything he hasn't heard about before.

Take care sweetie, hope you get it sorted. xxx

[EvilHandyAndy]

viagra is good cialis is better
but they only help with the blood flow
they dont get you off
and if you aint interested aint much gonna help
sounds like you have your mind on everything except the task at hand so try this

I only worry about the things i can control
because if i cant control it why worry?
and i find that if i center myself on the things i can control
and do them to the best of my ability
than the things i cant control tend to work themselfs out
and either way at the end of the day
i know i have done my best
and can tell the world to kiss my ass!

in other words quit worrying about everything elese and just deal with the here and now
and do the best ya can and move on

and quit dwelling on shit
it serves no purpose

[ballarke]

First, you've got a lot of integrity to say that you're going to love your girlfriend with or without sex. As you've probably seen elsewhere in this section, you (and I) are a rare breed.

Andy mentioned the possible medical aspects behind this. There are some diagnoses that, even at your age, will have an impact on your sex life. These include diabetes, various cardiovascular problems like high blood pressure or heart problems, some pulmonary problems like asthma, and so on. If there is a family history of any of these problems, you should be under a doctor's watch anyway, so seeing a doctor might not be a bad idea.

But Shannon also mentioned something worth noting as well: psychological aspects. There was a person elsewhere in this section who had a problem similar to yours: difficulty keeping or achieving erection. And I said to him one key thing: the more you think about it, the more difficult it'll become. In this case, the more you think about blowing your load, the more likely you are to not. So try to work it out of your mind. I know it'll be difficult, but try your best.

And your lifestyle isn't making it easier as well. Irregular sleep patterns and the like is going to put a damper on sex as well. Especially the part where you said you're up for 40 hours at a time. Eeesh. So a change in lifestyle is definitely a good thing. Good luck with that job interview and I hope things go well.

So basically it sounds like a doctor's eval and a change of lifestyle - well, at least your hours - is what you need. And if you go to the doctor, take your girlfriend with you as well so she can hear the doctor's explanations. That will probably help ease her pains a little.

[unomike2]

Sounds like you got a lot of advice here. And I'll support what Ballarke, Shannox and EHA has posted in response to your problem(s). I must add that a lot of young men when first experiencing sex with a woman will have some form of ED. You mentioned that you were able to ejaculate OK when you masturbated alone after she left. I suspect you may be suffering from "Performance Anxiety". Which means you put too much pressure on yourself to perform to your or her expectations. And having job problems and irregular sleeping patterns, diet, ect., can only compound your situation.

Remedy: Schedule a Doctors appointment, and while you are waiting for the appointment to roll around, follow Shannox's advice and just relax and not worry about it. You just may surprise yourself and your Girlfriend.

[TheMessenger]

Try masterbating infront of her to make yourself cum, maybe after blowing a load you will feel more relaxed and the burden of her seeing your cum will go away. Its just a thought...

Dont masterbate before sex.

Breathe heavily during sex and just totally focus on the activity not the lady. It may be just performance anxiety.

[melissalove]

very great advice Andy!

[pepsi_375]

Awesome.. you guys have been a great help so far.

Ok so i think it may just be performance anxiety.

When ever we have sex she is always talking about it and saying how much she wants me to cum in her. and so i guess that starts going through my head.

How can i overcome performance anxiety? Like how can i just relax and not think about it?

[mskitty6-9]

Seems like whether she realizes it or not, she may be putting pressure on you...and in turn, you may well have Performance Anxiety.

Can you ask her, nicely, not to talk about wanting you to cum in her? You already know how she feels...no need for her to keep telling you...as nice as it is that she wants to share that intimacy with you, her telling you again and again is not helping.

I have been with a guy who NEVER came from oral sex...with anyone...I tried my best...felt like a failure...so we worked around it...I still gave him oral and he enjoyed it...but I knew he was not gonna cum from it...
so the bj was followed by a hand job...and right before he started to cum, I could put him back in my mouth...
and we were both happy...


Awesome.. you guys have been a great help so far.

Ok so i think it may just be performance anxiety.

When ever we have sex she is always talking about it and saying how much she wants me to cum in her. and so i guess that starts going through my head.

How can i overcome performance anxiety? Like how can i just relax and not think about it?

[MarathonMan]

Awesome.. you guys have been a great help so far.

Ok so i think it may just be performance anxiety.

When ever we have sex she is always talking about it and saying how much she wants me to cum in her. and so i guess that starts going through my head.

How can i overcome performance anxiety? Like how can i just relax and not think about it?

Try not to think at all. I do it all the time:grin:
Or you could focus on something else, like making her cum, or put a porno on while you're having sex, focus on watching that, to take your mind off cumming.

Or, try not to cum, you never know, a bit of reverse psychology might be all you need.:thumbsup:

[unomike2]

Awesome.. you guys have been a great help so far.

Ok so i think it may just be performance anxiety.

When ever we have sex she is always talking about it and saying how much she wants me to cum in her. and so i guess that starts going through my head.

How can i overcome performance anxiety? Like how can i just relax and not think about it?

I'm going to give you some advice I gave another fellow several months back about Performance Anxiety. In relation to your situation, I think you could benefit from this information in working to solve your problem.

"OK, I had this problem too when I was getting my first piece of pussy. Went for two hours without orgasming ... she loved it, but she finished me off with her hand after she became sore down there. With a little experimenting, we (GF and I) found out that the cause for this problem was too much masturbating in between sexual sessions. My cock had become used to the hand and became "de-sensitized" enough that it required more friction to reach an orgasm during normal vaginal intercourse which naturally has less friction due to the woman's own sexual lubrications.

Performance Anixiety can play a part in your inability to reach an orgasm by vaginal friction alone if you are worried about pleasing a woman or being able to reach your own orgasm by vaginal intercourse. But it really is nothing to worry about. Once your cock becomes used to the vaginal friction, your worries are over.

ADVICE: Stop mastrubating for several weeks to allow your cock to "un-de-sensitize". And during that period, let your cock instead get used to the friction of vaginal intercourse. If you use a condom during sex, use the thin types of condoms designed for max. sensitivity. But if at all possible, don't use a condom (if you are not worried about STDs or getting her pregnant) in order to work on achiving your own "vaginal" orgasms. Your GF can also help by giving you a "light", no orgasm blowjob by using her tounge to stimulate the nerves in your cock-head, inserting her tounge in your pee hole and probing it as deep as she can, talking dirty to you and stimulating you futher by playing with your nipples while you are inside her. Just use your imagination and experiment to find what works best for the both of you."

[pepsi_375]

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[mskitty6-9]

I do not think legally your employer has the right to know WHY you
need to go to a doctor...

Let us know what happened...

Im off to the doctor today.. I tried not thinking about it last night. Tried singing metalica in my head. tried focusing on the tv.

I rang work to let them know that i had a doc appointment and i may b 5 mins late. They asked what kind of problem i was having that required me to go to the doctor. Im like its really a personal thing. they are so rude, i hate them, they only think about them selfs.

Thanks everyone for all the advice so far. im taking it all onboard. Hopefully the doctor will be able to help me aswell.

[pepsi_375]

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